I am so impressed with the responses. Many have really touched my heart. I feel blessed to have received so many - that you have taken the time to respond means a great deal to me.
One friend who preferred to remain anonymous wrote the following:
"Here's what I have to say about crying - just off the top of my head:
I think tears are a way of cleansing the soul. Tears don't let us lie to ourselves; they are a true sign of our deepest feelings. They are the most human part of being human. They reduce our stress. They are whispers that communicate with spirit, heart, body and mind and connect them to each other. When we let the tears flow and take time to truly consult with them and to reflect upon them, they will take us beyond emotion and into deeper meaning in our life. We should be grateful to our tears, because they tell us who we are and how we are right here, right now. No lying.
So why, Judith, can't you and I cry when we have so much to cry about?
Yours, in loving tears."
Again, thank you so very much for sharing - and please keep sharing - respond to each other. Judith
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2 years ago
To me tears seem to be a natural result of being in touch with our true emotions, both sad ones and joyful ones. Tears are very healing and I understand that when you cry there's a chemical released that helps reduce stress. When I worked in the corporate world I was fairly stressed and cried more easily. I probably needed it! Now that I'm more rejuvenated and centered, I don't cry quite as often but would regret not crying at all.
ReplyDeleteHere's to tears!!!
Nancy Grant
The cost of crying for me is that I find it an embarrassing and useless emotion and for me at least something completely outside of my control. I also believe it has something to do with my medical condition, as since being on treatment for a particular deficiency, crying, sometimes for absolutely no reason, is no longer such an issue. As for benefits, on a personal basis, well none really.
ReplyDeleteAlthough it may be argued there are both benefits and costs in relation to crying, I don't believe this is necessarily the important issue. Crying is often an expression of emotions such as grief, anxiety, pain, fear etc. Whether or not we express such emotions though crying or in other ways, is more to the point and we need to discover if it helps, makes it worse, or makes no difference? If crying gets a problem out of the system and brings some relief, then this is a benefit. If however crying brings no release and the person feels just as miserable, then rather useless and a waste of time. What is probably more important is finding ways to release pent up emotions in a useful, positive and effective way. Whether this is through crying, writing down what is causing us anxiety or grief, talking problems though with others, or some other method is really the most important factor. Bottling up such negative emotions and not being able to come to terms with what has caused them seems to me to be very negative. Finding ways to both release such emotions and working through the causes of them is imperative. Whether this is through crying or not crying really depends on the person and what works for them.
I guess this is much the way I feel Chrispy - and probably why I do not cry. If it doesn't relieve some pain or have some kind of positive outcome, then I do not see the point. But it is not like I stop the tears - they simply are not there. One person looks at a photo of animals and tears up - I look and say "What amazing photography!" I do tear up or get misty at movies, etc, but I dislike intensely when I feel as if I have been manipulated to cry. It is why I avoid shows on TV that do that. I figure if I need to cry, I will. Thanks for your comments, Judith
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your writing style and I've added you to my Reader. Keep these posts coming.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all congratulation for such a great site. I learned a lot reading article here today. I will make sure i visit this site once a day so i can learn more.
ReplyDeleteI liked your comments about crying. I really think I need to learn more about Judith and life coaching. Well, you see, I am a cryer. I have been all my life. It is one emotion I seem to never be able to control. I cry very easily. I am very sentimental. I feel crying has to do with one's personality. Some people are just more emotional than others. I have been this way since I was a child. I often wonder why I can't control my crying, but I also try to accept that that is just a part of who I am. I have learned to not be ashamed of my crying. Thanks for listening!
ReplyDeleteHi Marie, I love you honesty. I used to be a crier as well. Something changed, though, I just don't seem to "need" to cry as much - in fact hardly at all. My tears are now more a symptom of a feeling or an emotion that touches me. But is more inward with a few tears. I may be with someone I love and a tear will flow. I may be praying and a feeling of rapture comes over me and I will become misty. My crying is more like that. Out and out crying out loud has not happened for at least 3 years. I think it is because I no longer "need" to cry. Does this make sense? Judith
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